Just like you deep clean your home each spring and get rid of old takeout menus, random items, and outdated clothes, you need to do the same for your dating life. Some of the wisdom you gained over the years needs to be ditched to be successful on your dating journey.
Whether you got dating advice from your friends, mother, father, or the internet, there are some things you need to ditch in the modern dating world. As the leading New Jersey matchmaking service, we know there’s a lot of outdated advice that needs to be ignored, as well as some dating techniques that won’t work for everyone. Get ready for a romantic overhaul as our matchmakers uncover the dating advice you need to throw out the window.
1. Play hard to get. It works wonders.
This little piece of advice continues to be passed down through generations, but does it really work? Absolutely not. When someone is genuinely looking for a relationship, they want a man or woman who puts the same efforts into the relationship. If you are playing hard to get, they will get discouraged and stop the pursuit. If you are interested in him or her, make your intentions known from the beginning instead of playing hard to get.
2. Women shouldn’t make the first move.
Don’t get us wrong here, because there is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting a man to pursue you, court you, and chase you. What woman on earth doesn’t like it when a man wines and dines her? But we live in a modern world where women can now make the first move. Don’t make the mistake of missing out on a great man because you were hoping for him to make the first move. Sometimes men are clueless, and all it takes is a little introduction to get the ball rolling.
3. Make it known that other men are waiting in line for you.
Sending yourself a bouquet of roses at work and playing other tricks will not work. Sending the message that men are getting in line to be with you isn’t going to get you the attention you want. As the leading New Jersey matchmaking service, we know confidence is key in dating, especially for women. Instead of acting like men are flocking you, just let your confidence shine and win him over for you. Believe us, the right man will know you’re a great catch without you having to point it out.
4. Don’t be too available.
This dating advice goes back longer than we’ve been in business, and we’ve been in business for nearly 30 years. Whether you’re waiting a few days to respond to their emails, three days to return their calls, or returning their calls and acting like you only have a quick minute to talk is going to backfire on you. Acting like you’re too busy for someone is only going to push them away, especially when they get tired and frustrated after so many failed attempts. If he or she is interested in you, and you’re into them as well, make time to be with them, and don’t make it feel like they’re fighting for time on your schedule.
5. Be a tease. They’ll love it.
Flirting and teasing are two completely different things. Flirting will work in your favor, while teasing will backfire on you.
The dating advice floating around the internet always says that in order to get a man’s attention, a woman must tease him. But as matchmakers, we know this confuses men and gives them the wrong signal. We are here to tell you that men aren’t good with signals and usually get it all wrong. Instead of playing the teasing game, be straightforward with him. Most men will agree that this is the best approach.
6. Online dating is the best way to meet someone.
This little piece of advice is comical. Of course you can go online and solve many problems, but when it comes to dating, well, it’s not that easy. “Go online” is the new term for get out there. But the truth is, online dating isn’t all that helpful. If anything, it’s rather time-consuming and overwhelming. What’s more? Online dating can actually be dangerous because you’re meeting people you know nothing about. If you want the best approach for your dating life, then be proactive, but don’t rely on online dating sites. Nowadays, there are matchmaking services that can help you find love. New Jersey matchmaking services like ours here at South Jersey Matchmakers provide a timesaving, safe, and private way of meeting like-minded singles who are also searching for a serious relationship—no games, no hassles, no risks.
7. You’re not getting any younger, take what you can get.
Of course we know you’re not getting any younger, but following this dating advice will lead to you living a miserable life. This dating advice suggests you settle for anything that comes your way because you’re getting older, which is something we couldn’t disagree with more. You should never settle in your romantic life.
8. Be a jerk, women love it.
For the most part, women aren’t attracted to jerks. People have been giving this dating advice for many years now. Why? Because jerks do get a lot of women, but that’s because they’re not afraid of putting themselves out there. Generally speaking, jerks have no problem approaching women, which improves their chances of finding one. Nice guys, on the other hand, have fears of approaching women, but that doesn’t make them any less worthy. As professional matchmakers, we’re here to tell you that women don’t like jerks. However, they do like confident men.
9. If they’re the one, you’ll know right away.
One of the worst pieces of dating advice we’ve heard. As the leading New Jersey matchmaking service, we know firsthand it takes time to build attraction. Sure, sometimes there is instant chemistry, but attraction takes time to be developed. You can’t expect sparks to fly on a first date or expect to fall in love right away because that’s just not the way real love and attraction work.
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