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Home / Dating Advice / Dating in New Jersey? 6 Mistakes You Must Avoid!

Do you have a 1st date coming up? Our dating and matchmaking experts here at South Jersey Matchmakers will give you the scoop on what mistakes you avoid to make it a successful first date.

What were you doing last Friday night? If you were home alone watching reruns of Breaking Bad or you were being slapped outside of the restaurant at the end of your date, then chances are you’re making one of the most common dating mistakes singles make. Today, our matchmaking professionals here at South Jersey Matchmakers will review the most common dating mistakes so you can find out what it is that you’re doing wrong and how you can become successful at dating.

Worst 1st Date Mistake #1: Playing Hard to Get

Your friends might tell you that playing hard to get is the thing to do to be successful at dating, but the last time they must have gone out on a date was when they were 15. Our matchmakers don’t want you to play hard to get. Even if there was an initial connection, it will completely turn your date off. By the time the bill arrives, if you have played hard to get all evening, they will have lost all interest in you.

What to Do Next Time Around

Don’t act like you are God’s gift to the opposite sex. Don’t act like you’re better than them. What you need to do is give them signals that you’re interested. Touch their arm gently or look into their eyes for a few seconds. Little hints like this will let them know that you’re interested.

Worst 1st Date Mistake #2: Having Wandering Eyes

Even if the most attractive looking man has walked into the restaurant, or a supermodel just walked in the bar where you and your date are sitting enjoying a drink, be strong about it and don’t check them out.
Your date already knows that a gorgeous looking woman or a very attractive man just entered the place, but what they are doing is gauging to see what you do. They’re looking for your reaction. If you stare at them or drool over their toned body, your date will be humiliated and will not want to go out with you a second time around.

What to Do Next Time Around

Our matchmakers don’t ever want you checking someone else out if you are on a date. But if you are one of those people who must get a look, just wait a few minutes and excuse yourself to go to the bathroom. Then, on your way back to the table, you can get a very quick glance at this person, but don’t ever do it from the table you and your date are sitting. It’s very disrespectful.

Worst 1st Date Mistake #3: You Ask for Permission
There is nothing more of a turn off than when someone asks for permission to move in for a kiss. Eww. It shows a lack of confidence, assertiveness, and if you had to ask for a kiss, you know it wasn’t meant to be. Although our matchmakers don’t suggest you become aggressive about it, asking for permission for a kiss is a classic first date mistake.

What to Do Next Time Around

Try to figure out why you need to ask permission. If you need to ask permission because you lack confidence, then read some helpful advice on becoming a better kisser. Also, try not to overthink the moment too much. Despite all the hype, the first kiss isn’t usually all it’s made out to be.

Worst 1st Date Mistake #4: Being Too Mysterious

Although the very mysterious men and women are sexy in movies, in real life, it comes off as arrogant or shy, two qualities that are not good when it comes to dating. Instead of being silent, why not open up and show them your true personality? If you reveal your true qualities from the beginning, you will have a better chance of being successful with them rather than playing the mysterious card.

What to Do Next Time Around

Forget the attitude, and instead of being mysterious, talk about topics you like. Show the person you’re out on a date with what type of person you really are. Not only will your date be more interested, but both of you will be more relaxed and have more fun.

Worst 1st Date Mistake #5: Talking about Pas Infidelity

One of the worst mistakes you can commit during a first date is talking about how you cheated on your ex. If you tell the person you’re out on a date with that you have committed infidelities in the past, chances are they are not going to want to see you again. Being unfaithful is ranked as one of the worst turn offs in the dating world.
What to Do Next Time Around

Avoid talking about your ex and stop mentioning the fact that you cheated on them. Although eventually you will have to tell the truth, a first date isn’t the place to do it.

Worst 1st Date Mistake #6: Using Your Cell Phone

Sure, you connect with others online and your phone is one of the best tools while you’re on the go; however, when you’re out on a date, you need to put your smartphone away. Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram can all wait until after the date. Text messaging your friends, updating pictures, and checking your email is a quick way of letting your date know that you’re not interested in them.

What to Do Next Time Around

To prevent from ruining your next first date, keep your cell phone away. You need to resist the urge to check your text messages and emails while you’re out on a date and give your date your undivided attention. They have taken time to go out with you and the polite thing to do is be respectful of their time.

If you have are not committing any of these classic dating mistakes but are still struggling to date, contact our matchmaking professionals here at South Jersey Matchmakers today to set up a one-on-one consultation. We will give you the guidance and coaching you need to be successful in dating. Let us help you kick up your romantic life!

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