In today’s modern dating world, divorce rates are at an all-time high. But for some reason, divorced men still catch weird eyes in the dating scene. Most people look at divorced men as failures, but that’s not true. Some single women in New Jersey even cringe at the idea of dating a divorced man, even if his divorce was amicable.
As a professional matchmaking service in New Jersey, we don’t want you to count divorced men out of your dating life. Many divorced men are actually good people and make great partners. In fact, some of the best relationships we’ve seen have come from divorced singles in New Jersey. If you are searching for Mr. Right, don’t count out a divorced man.
Things to Keep in Mind When Dating a Divorced Man
If you’re like many single women in New Jersey, you might have come across a few divorced men on your path to love. Before you embark on your journey, our dating experts here at South Jersey Matchmakers want you to keep a few things in mind before dating a divorced guy. If you approach the situation right, this could be the best relationship you’ve ever been in.
1. Timing Is Everything
Before you start dating a divorced man, make sure you know where his divorce stands. Has he already gotten a divorce, or is he just starting the procedure?
Knowing where he stands will tell you everything you need to know. It will tell you if he is ready for a relationship or still needs time to heal. You don’t want to date a man who is still going through the divorce procedure; after all, everyone needs time to heal.
2. You Might Have to Be a Little Discreet
Okay, so he just got divorced, but that doesn’t mean this event is completely gone from his life. His group of friends could still be good friends with his ex, so he might have to keep it hush for a while. He probably expects you to be discreet with the relationship, at least until things get more serious.
3. Don’t Put Anything on Social Media
While on the topic of being discreet, we want you to keep the relationship off your social media accounts. Discretion doesn’t just mean staying away from his friends but also from the public eye. Try to keep the dates to yourself and don’t advertise anything about the relationship on Facebook or Instagram. This is especially true if the divorce is recent, because people will think you are a homewrecker, and that’s not something you want to be known as.
4. He Has Done This Before
Although he might not be dismissing the idea of marriage altogether, he has been there and done that before. Do not date a divorced man hoping to get a proposal right away because it will not happen. He is most likely playing the field and testing the waters right now. But don’t let this discourage you in your relationship. On the upside, he knows how to handle a relationship and has life figured out.
5. You’re Going to Hear a Lot About His Ex
Be prepared to hear a lot about this ex, especially if the divorce is still fresh. You might ask him about his day only to find out that he talked to or saw his ex at lunch. Don’t let this anger or upset you because they are still working things out as part of the divorce, especially if they have children together. Be confident enough in yourself not to let his ex get to you. And by no means take it personally when he has to talk to her.
6. Don’t Ask for Details
While your new man and his ex might have to talk to each other and see one another occasionally, it doesn’t mean you need to ask and dig for details. While it’s natural for you to be curious, don’t be pushy. Let him tell you what he is comfortable telling you.
7. You Might Have to Meet Her
If he shares responsibilities with her, such as children, a pet, or a business, you might come across her one day. While it might be awkward, as a mature woman you need to be polite. She might be bitter that you’re dating her ex, but don’t let this affect your relationship. Just remember to be the bigger person and never make anything worse.
8. He Might Still Have Some of Her Belongings
If you think the divorce is over and done with, think again. You might come across a few of her belongings at his place, so be prepared for this. You might see all her body lotions and hygiene products when you get a shower, or perhaps you’ll see a picture or two tucked away in one of his drawers. You might even be sleeping on the bed they shared. But don’t let any of this affect your relationship.
9. You Might Feel Judged by Those Close to Him
Once he introduces you to those close to him, be prepared because some of them might not like you. They could scrutinize you and compare you to his ex. Here at South Jersey Matchmakers, we want you to hold your head high and walk through this tough stage with confidence.
Remember that you cannot please everyone. And as long as your boyfriend knows that you’re a good person, that’s all that matters.
10. He Could Be Scarred
Not all divorces end in a peaceful way. Keep this in mind as you go along with the relationship. He could be scarred from the failed marriage, which could cause him to act a certain way. Sometimes it’s best to let him deal with his own personal issues. At the same time, you should always be by his side to show your support when he needs you.
Many single women in New Jersey don’t know who their Mr. Right will be. He could be a man that was previously married. Don’t cross off guys who are divorced just because of a failed marriage. Relationships with a divorced man can be more complex but they’re also fulfilling.
If you’re not meeting relationship-worthy guys on your own, contact our matchmakers and let us help you. We have helped many single women in New Jersey find their Mr. Right and we’re confident we can help you too. Fill out the private survey at the top of the page to reserve your FREE, no-obligation consultation to get started today!
