How Singles in New Jersey Can Avoid Getting Attached Too Soon

By South Jersey Matchmakers
Home / Dating Advice / How Singles in New Jersey Can Avoid Getting Attached Too Soon

It’s true, women do fall faster than men.  Maybe it’s because women have big hearts, or men just do a better job of hiding it.  But the truth is, falling too fast is never good.

It can be challenging to be surrounded by friends and family who are in happy relationships while you’re all alone just hoping to find one.  This longing for a relationship can land you in trouble if you’re not careful.  Falling too fast can have a detrimental effect on anyone’s life.  When you do find someone you click with, you need to take your time dating.  The last thing you want is to skip over vital parts of the dating process.  Today, our matchmakers will show you how to slow down the dating process to avoid falling head over heels too soon.

singles in new jersey

1. Have your own hobbies and interests.

The more you have going on in your life, the less time you’ll spend thinking about them and obsessing about the relationship.  Plus, having your own hobbies and interests gives you goals and passions in life, something to focus on other than this new relationship.  Here at South Jersey Matchmakers, we want you to find love and companionship.  But the process should never be rushed along.  Go ahead and keep participating in your own hobbies and interests so this new relationship isn’t the center of your world.

2. See other people.

If this relationship isn’t exclusive, then you have every right to see other people.  If you’re not committed to each other, you’re free to go out on dates with others you meet.  Meeting new people and having a good time will keep you from overthinking and prevent you from putting all your eggs in one basket.  If this relationship isn’t official, there are other people out there you can mingle with and get to know.

3. Never have sex too soon.

One of the worst mistakes you can make in a new relationship is having sex too soon.  This rule is especially fitting for women, because having sex too soon will cause you to get emotionally attached to this person.  If you are interested in establishing a real relationship, take your time dating and take a detour from the bedroom, at least for now.  Get to know this person better before you take things to the bedroom.

4. Spend time with your own friends.

Look, we know that you are head over heels for this new person, but to prevent yourself from getting attached too soon, you need to spend time with your friends.  Many singles in New Jersey make the mistake of neglecting their friends for their new relationship.  They stop hanging out with those who are close to them just so they can spend all their time with their new love interest.  Falling into this pattern will make you become very attached to this new man or woman, causing you to revolve your whole life around them.

5. Put the phone away.

Stop waiting for their text messages, emails, and phone calls.  Look, instead of waiting around for them to reach out to you, why don’t you live your life to the fullest?  Leave the phone at your house and get out there and do something fun, spend time with your friends, or participate in your hobbies and interests.

6. Don’t stalk them on social media.

You don’t have to like or comment on every picture or status they post on social media.  Really, this will drive them crazy and push them away.  Instead, do yourself a favor and get out of your house.  Go do something you’ve always wanted to do, go to the spa, or just spend time with friends.  You need to live your life and do productive things to prevent yourself from stalking them on social media.

7. Don’t cancel plans for them.

After being in the dating and matchmaking industry for nearly three decades, we know that many singles in New Jersey are guilty of this one.  Sure, we want you to accept their invitations and go out and have a good time.  However, you should never cancel previous plans to spend time with them.  If you and a friend have agreed to go out on Friday night and your new love interest asks you to go out with them on Friday night too, don’t cancel with your friend.  Not only will this prevent you from getting attached too soon, but it will serve as a reminder to them that you have your own life.

8. Don’t change your life.

On the same note as above, you don’t want to change your life because you’re dating someone new.  Ladies, if you’re used to going to yoga classes on Wednesdays, continue to go.  Gentlemen, if you’re used to playing poker with the guys on Thursday nights, keep on attending.  If you don’t want to get too attached to this person, you need to continue living your life the way you always did.  Never change the rhythm of your life because of someone new.

9. Keep some things private for now.

He or she doesn’t need to know every single detail of your life, at least not just yet.  Never tell them your whole life story at once.  It’s okay to keep some of your life private for now, and keep some of your feelings to yourself as well.  There will be plenty of time to discuss everything with them down the road, but you never want to go overboard in the beginning stages of the relationship.

It doesn’t matter how attractive this new person is, or how great you think you are together, don’t get attached too soon.  Relationships should develop slowly; otherwise, you risk getting attached too soon and pushing them away.

Here at South Jersey Matchmakers, we help singles in New Jersey find meaningful relationships.  If you are ready to find that special someone, contact our expert matchmakers today and let us assist you on your search.  Fill out the quick survey at the top of the page to get started today!

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