New Jersey Matchmakers | 5 Tips to Fight Fair in a Relationship

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The happiest relationships aren’t free of conflict. On the contrary, they have their fair share of healthy fights. The difference is in determining how to fight fair and solve the conflict in a respectful and efficient way.

If you truly love your partner, then you need to adopt the top rules of conflict resolution in a relationship. Taking the time to learn the rules and establish boundaries during an argument is much more important for your relationship than concentrating on never having a fight. After all, as long as you’re doing it right, fighting can be healthy in a relationship.

Man pleading with his wife after a fight

Discover how to improve your communication and strengthen your relationship as the best New Jersey matchmakers reveal the top rules for conflict resolution in a relationship.

1. Don’t scream.

This is rule number one. You never want to get carried away and start screaming during an argument with your partner. When emotions are added to the mix, things naturally take a turn for the worst. Not only do emotions cloud the real issue of what’s going on or what happened, but things will immediately escalate and get out of control. Nothing good comes from yelling during an argument.

If your partner is yelling, then you must do everything you can to keep from yelling yourself. Tell them that you’re not going to speak to them until they calm down and stop raising their voice. Let them know you’re not going to continue until they are calm and collected.

2. Begin and end by letting them know you love and care for them.  

This one is very overlooked by most couples out there, yet it’s very important. It’s essential to let your partner know that you love and care for them at the start of the argument and once it’s squashed. This affirmation of love can prevent you from saying mean and nasty things and help you resolve the conflict in a respectful and caring manner.

3. Be accepting of the idea that you might’ve been wrong.

Nobody likes to hear that they’re wrong. But we’re all human, and we all make mistakes. It is important that you’re open to the idea that you might have made a mistake that caused the disagreement. Even if you’re sure you didn’t cause the conflict, you can’t go into the fight with a close-minded attitude. That automatically sets a bad tone for the fight and makes you look arrogant.

If your partner is upset, it’s clearly for a reason. Listen to them without interrupting or insisting that you’re not wrong, because people rarely get worked up if there isn’t some air of truth in what they’re saying.

4. Give clear and concise examples.

It’s important you don’t speak generally of your partner’s behaviors but rather that you give clear and concise examples of things they do. It’s very difficult for anyone to own up to being wrong when they’re being generalized. However, it’s a whole lot easier for someone to consider the fact that they might be wrong when a specific instance of action is recited. It’s easier to see where they went wrong when you give them a direct example.

5. Don’t hold back on apologizing first.

Sure, it’s vindicating to hold out on apologizing when you’re in an argument with your partner. But it also shows that you care more about being right than you do about solving the issue at hand or their feelings. Don’t be afraid to be the first one to apologize, even if you’re not the one in the wrong. It shows that you’re mature, respectful, and that you truly do love them. It lets them know you care about them and that you don’t let your pride and ego get in the way.

Arguing means you care and that you want to come to a resolution for the issue at hand so you can move on and continue being happy in your relationship. When you don’t care about one another, then you would each turn your backs, ignore each other, and walk away. But that’s not the case for you. You’re here because you love your partner and want to learn how to solve conflicts the right way. Showing that you care about each other, even in the midst of conflict, is key in preserving the love and the relationship.

Use these five expert tips from the best New Jersey matchmakers and experience a difference in the way you fight with your partner. You’ll be able to improve communication and solve arguments in a healthy and respectful way.

If you’re single and searching for that special someone, contact our New Jersey matchmakers today and let us make the introductions. Let us introduce you to relationship-ready singles in New Jersey who are fit to date and compatible with you.

To reserve your FREE (90-minute) matchmaking consultation, simply fill out the confidential form at the top of the page today.

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